• Go to page :
  • 1 2345
  • Text Only
Voting History
rated:
I am turning 40 in a few months (yikes!). I know its a cliché, but I feel this strong need to spend some $$$ on something stupid, probably a fast car. Its hard to explain, but its just a reality of life I guess.

Here is the problem. I havn't budgeted / saved for this. I've been married for more than 8 years and my finances are pretty much completely transparent to my wife. I wish I had the kind of relationship where I could say, "Honey I need, NEED to spend $80k on a german sportscar", but I do not. We have 3 kids and wife is hell bent on saving money for college for the little ones.

I have 6 months. Taking on debt is not really an option. I feel like I can probably squirrel away $1000 a month, but I'm not sure that will be enought to fulfil my need.

I am open to suggestions. Advice how you may have justfified this expense to your significant other. Ways to get something fun for only $6000 or less. Ways to "hide" expenses like this. Also would be interested in hearing what others have done for their crisis.

Member Summary
Most Recent Posts
I had my first mid-life crisis at 25...

Al3xK (May. 02, 2013 @ 3:02p) |

The E36 is probably the perfect car. It's got great balance, classic german looks, economical to operate and maintain (... (more)

kriskos4 (May. 02, 2013 @ 3:24p) |

lol...I can't believe there is a thread about this! I turn 40 in July and I am doing the same thing...shopping for a sp... (more)

cnvrtble98 (May. 04, 2013 @ 12:50a) |

Thanks for visiting FatWallet.com. Join for free to remove this ad.

When you go to the grocery store, start taking out 2-300 in Cash Back each time. It looks like grocery on statement, and you have cash in your pocket. Finance the car and make the payments with this method.

kinggofg said:   I am turning 40 in a few months (yikes!). I know its a cliché, but I feel this strong need to spend some $$$ on something stupid, probably a fast car. Its hard to explain, but its just a reality of life I guess.

Here is the problem. I havn't budgeted / saved for this. I've been married for more than 8 years and my finances are pretty much completely transparent to my wife. I wish I had the kind of relationship where I could say, "Honey I need, NEED to spend $80k on a german sportscar", but I do not. We have 3 kids and wife is hell bent on saving money for college for the little ones.

I have 6 months. Taking on debt is not really an option. I feel like I can probably squirrel away $1000 a month, but I'm not sure that will be enought to fulfil my need.

I am open to suggestions. Advice how you may have justfified this expense to your significant other. Ways to get something fun for only $6000 or less. Ways to "hide" expenses like this. Also would be interested in hearing what others have done for their crisis.

Trying to "hide" five figure items from your spouse can have serious negative consequences. Tread carefully.

Maybe she won't let you drop $80k on a car, but would spending $6k on a trip somewhere cool be ok?
Get three close guy friends together, each put in $5k, and you now have $20k to spend on a really awesome experience (and you came in under budget!).

For my mid-life crisis (43 yo now) I decided to grow up and not have one. Saved a bunch of money that way, and my wife appreciates my honesty so much that she continues to sleep with me on a regular basis.

even if you saved 80k hiding from your wife, wouldn't your wife ask like "how did you get this new cool car, honey?" or you are planning to hide the car as well

realistically, how smart are the kids? maybe you don't need a college fund.

H&B of course

My vote is for a cool guys trip. She'd probably let you spend $5k on that if you were really nice.

Are you ready to be single again?

haha i love this thread... I feel like i'm in a late 20's funk and need to spend a lot of money. I seem to have a guys trip every year to compensate

Do like my Dad. Home equity line of credit. Or not.

Smoke a little weed and lift some weights in the garage. Much less expensive. Avoid any closet nazi gay neighbors though.

beatme said:   Maybe she won't let you drop $80k on a car, but would spending $6k on a trip somewhere cool be ok?
Get three close guy friends together, each put in $5k, and you now have $20k to spend on a really awesome experience (and you came in under budget!).


I second this. You can go to Vegas and rent a Ferrari for $500-ish a day. The OP will hate having to spend the upkeep on a sports car (tires do not last long, are $500+ each, you'll want to have the fluids replaced regularly, use good quality motor oil and filters, get pissed at any door ding, etc)

@vquasarv: If I recall correctly, that didn't really endear him to his wife either....

kinggofg said:   
I am open to suggestions. Advice how you may have justfified this expense to your significant other. Ways to get something fun for only $6000 or less. Ways to "hide" expenses like this. Also would be interested in hearing what others have done for their crisis.


Get a Harley instead.
The perfect vehicle for people with midlife crisis who can't afford midlife crisis sports cars.

Go to Amsterdam.

Let all your frustration out.

Go home.

How old are the kids?

Get a used pair of jet skis. You can have fun on your own, and you can have fun days on the water with the family. But remember, your buying them for the family...

Or get a motorcycle.

Agree with renting super cars in Vegas .
Owning an exotic car isn't fun, its a maintenance hassle

If you are determined to own , get something like the new CLA Mercedes that's $29900. Your wife will probably drive it more than you

SUCKISSTAPLES said:   Agree with renting super cars in Vegas .
Owning an exotic car isn't fun, its a maintenance hassle

If you are determined to own , get something like the new CLA Mercedes that's $29900. Your wife will probably drive it more than you


vegas in general for all types of crises.

It's pretty easy to see the way this one is heading. So, pics of the wife?

kinggofg said:   I am turning 40 in a few months (yikes!). I know its a cliché, but I feel this strong need to spend some $$$ on something stupid, probably a fast car. Its hard to explain, but its just a reality of life I guess.

Here is the problem. I havn't budgeted / saved for this. I've been married for more than 8 years and my finances are pretty much completely transparent to my wife. I wish I had the kind of relationship where I could say, "Honey I need, NEED to spend $80k on a german sportscar", but I do not. We have 3 kids and wife is hell bent on saving money for college for the little ones.

I have 6 months. Taking on debt is not really an option. I feel like I can probably squirrel away $1000 a month, but I'm not sure that will be enought to fulfil my need.

I am open to suggestions. Advice how you may have justfified this expense to your significant other. Ways to get something fun for only $6000 or less. Ways to "hide" expenses like this. Also would be interested in hearing what others have done for their crisis.


This is not a FINANCE question, but rather a marriage/family relationship situation. Most FWF members will tell you not to drop $80K on a midlife crisis whim in the first place, let alone giving you advice on hiding assets from you wife, which may result in a divorce, which will be the second financial disaster.

Buy a vehicle that has a stable value. Try something like a Toyota Supra, mid 90's Acura NSX, or an old Corvette. Drive it for a few months until you're done with your childish episode and sell it for what you paid - or for a profit.

Squeezer99 said:   beatme said:   Maybe she won't let you drop $80k on a car, but would spending $6k on a trip somewhere cool be ok?
Get three close guy friends together, each put in $5k, and you now have $20k to spend on a really awesome experience (and you came in under budget!).


I second this. You can go to Vegas and rent a Ferrari for $500-ish a day. The OP will hate having to spend the upkeep on a sports car (tires do not last long, are $500+ each, you'll want to have the fluids replaced regularly, use good quality motor oil and filters, get pissed at any door ding, etc)


Another idea along the same lines is to sign up for a performance driving class, like this. You'll get to drive $80K german sportscar, get it out of the system and spend only a couple thousand at the end.

kinggofg said:   Ways to "hide" expenses like this.Worst move ever. You are at the point in life where you want to do something fun and exhilarating, and you want to hide it from your wife? That's going to cost you a lot more than $80k in the long run.

There are plenty of thrills out there for much less money. Find something you can afford - and take your wife with you.

Nsx. Used M3. Hell, Miatas are incredibly fun cars. Get one and drive it like you stole it. Most folks I know who own 80k-value cars drive them like old ladies and drop a ton of dough on maintenance and cleaning. You can track a miata and outrun MUCH more expensive cars.

Or go skydiving, hot-air ballooning, bungee-jumping, etc. All of that will put your life in perspective for less than 6k

MechTeach said:   @vquasarv: If I recall correctly, that didn't really endear him to his wife either....

But it did endear him to Mena Suvari, who given the relative ages involved was an upgrade to Annette Benning (who was also tramping off with Peter Gallagher).

Buy the car and shout out "YOLO" while leaving the dealership.

kinggofg said:   I am open to suggestions. Advice how you may have justfified this expense to your significant other.

Easy. Let her spend one-half on herself.

bigdinkel said:   Buy the car and shout out "YOLO" while leaving the dealership.
You say no to ratchet women , SIS can't !

I had my mid-life crisis at 30.

kinggofg said:   I am turning 40 in a few months (yikes!). The old folks here take offense when you call 40 "midlife"

I vote rent a supercar for a day. Groupon/ Living Social/Travelzoo have deals. Much easier to justify a few hundred on a weekend of fun at the racetrack than losing half your $$$ and needing to try to find as great of a 2nd wife with half your current income.

I must not have that gene in my DNA. I never had the desire to blow a bunch of money when I turned 30, 40, or recently 50. (Course, we never had kids either, so maybe that is part of it)

ellory said:   kinggofg said:   I am turning 40 in a few months (yikes!). The old folks here take offense when you call 40 "midlife"

Midlife....it should be defined as 35-45 because most people will die between 70-90 and 70/2 = 35 and 90/2 = 45 and those are all nice round numbers.

First realize that that its a want not a need... Then you'll make a better foolish decision.

I started a betterment account for this exact reason a few years back. Expect a thread from me in a decade..."my mid-life crisis account is at $1XX,000 what should I blow my money on?"

kinggofg said:   . Ways to "hide" expenses like this.

Spouses find out about hidden expenditures. They will assume that such money is spent on:

a) hotel rooms or a little love pad someplace;
b) sleezy lingerie in a size too small for them to wear;
c) jewelry to keep the young skank interested in her sugar daddy; and/or
d) drugs; and/or
e) a little gambling problem.

All of this can lead to a lot more intense excitement and emotional upheaval in your life than trying to realize a silly little fantasy, but unfortunately, involving rather negative emotions. But you may end up afterward being able to buy whatever you like, from what's left of your paycheck after deductions for child support and ex-spousal maintenance.

Tell your wife you want some sort of midlife crisis reward, not just for you, but for the two of you. Someone else mentioned this, but consider an used Miata - as long as you haven't spoiled yourself on something a lot more powerful and expensive, I think you'd have a very hard time finding something more fun to drive than a Miata. Between its small size, light weight and overall excellent sports-oriented engineering, they have the remarkable benefit of making you think you're going a whole lot faster than you really are, which, of course, attracts a great deal fewer speeding tickets than cars that are actually going 30mph faster than you thought they were. Take your wife with you as you test drive a few Miatas and give her the first drive. She'll think "It's sooo cute!" and then you hit her with "I have to say, you look really hot behind the wheel in that. I swear that car makes you look 5 years younger." Then all you need to do is make sure you have enough space cleared out for a 3/4-sized car in your garage.

Mine was drugs for some reason (had never done drugs while younger). The business person inside me ended up profiting on MY HABIT instead of losing money however. For the record, I am past that phase.

Edit: "MY HABIT" is a store autolink from fatwallet. That's funny, have not seen that one before.
\

Skipping 156 Messages...
lol...I can't believe there is a thread about this! I turn 40 in July and I am doing the same thing...shopping for a sports car. I set a budget though and started planning last year. I am going to spend $18k or less on a used two-seater convertible! I live in the North East so I am keeping my current car and getting this to only drive in the summer. I figure I will keep it two years and get rid of it. Anyone who went through this last year want to sell me the car they bought for their "midlife crisis"?



Disclaimer: By providing links to other sites, FatWallet.com does not guarantee, approve or endorse the information or products available at these sites, nor does a link indicate any association with or endorsement by the linked site to FatWallet.com.

Thanks for visiting FatWallet.com. Join for free to remove this ad.

TRUSTe online privacy certification

While FatWallet makes every effort to post correct information, offers are subject to change without notice.
Some exclusions may apply based upon merchant policies.
© 1999-2014