NO SOLICITING! http://txfx.net/2004/02/22/no-soliciting-sign/

(Unless you are someone under the age of 12 selling something sweet, like cookies or candy, at a price not to exceed $2.00, for your scout troop, sports team, or church group. I’m sympathetic to child slave labor, I like kids, and I like cookies even better.)

But if you do not fall into that category, I don’t want your magazine because I already have a subscription. I don’t want your newspaper because I already get it. I do not want to pay you to run, walk, swim, jog, jog-walk, swim-jog, or walk-run. I do not want to pay you to cure AIDS. I don’t want to fund your fraternity’s trip to Mexico. I genuinely hope that together we can help stop female breast cancer, and while I’ll be more than happy to give you a free exam, I do not want to pay you to examine others. I do not want a “trial” anything. I do not want to pay you to leave me alone, that’s what this sign is for. I do not want you to keep standing in front of my door, reading this sign in the hopes that I might have posted an exception for your particular breed of leech. If you want my money, feel free to try robbing me. I carry a knife with a 4-inch blade and will gladly extend your smile to your ears. Thank you, and the best of luck screwing over my neighbors.
Edit: More links:

Message Text For: how to put up a "no soliciting" sign without being rude?
This Design is Available on 54 Products http://www.cafepress.com/buy/private+property/No%20soliciting/


http://www.plaquemaker.com/No_Soliciting_Sign.html
http://www.funfry.com/data/508/medium/no_trespadding_violators_shot_funfry_resize.JPG
http://www.nightvisionsigns.com/image.php?productid=16237
http://usmcpress.com/hpimages/neverminddog.jpg

9/10

Great sign Gilbert!

I plan to print it and slap it on my door.