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stuff at work 4: The post-truth edition

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#3 was locked?  So let me start by ... AGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

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We recently spent $58K on a "part".
The part was custom made from scratch.
The part is 56 feet long.
The day after I took delivery, I am told it will never be installed.....

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It's amazing to see how organizational hierarchy affects how a company works, or not.

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I yearn for this. 

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kirbydog said:   I yearn for this. 
  That doesn't look right. A REAL manager relies on threats, blaming and scapegoating when things go wrong and taking full credit for things that go right.

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woowoo2 said:   We recently spent $58K on a "part".
The part was custom made from scratch.
The part is 56 feet long.
The day after I took delivery, I am told it will never be installed.....

  is this related to the 13lb horse penis?

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"It doesn't do that."

"Here's a picture of it doing that."

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miserly said:   
woowoo2 said:   We recently spent $58K on a "part".
The part was custom made from scratch.
The part is 56 feet long.
The day after I took delivery, I am told it will never be installed.....

  is this related to the 13lb horse penis?

  Nope, that was installed.....

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woowoo2 said:   
miserly said:   
woowoo2 said:   We recently spent $58K on a "part".
The part was custom made from scratch.
The part is 56 feet long.
The day after I took delivery, I am told it will never be installed.....

  is this related to the 13lb horse penis?

  Nope, that was installed.....

  
Being someone's employee is terrible.

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I'm researching into hiring a company to bring in massage therapists for chair massages at work. I have worked in 2 different companies where we did this as a staff reward and everyone loves it. It is usually set up for 15 minute appointments. Forget the team building malarky, we want to feel more relaxed!

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Nap Pod is my suggestion. I also expected to be laughed at.

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ZenNUTS said:   Nap Pod is my suggestion. I also expected to be laughed at.
  We have discussed having a quiet room with a place to lie down. Who keeps it clean, how to keep out the boss's dog, etc. are issues that would fall on me and I'm not interested. Our office cleaning is only once weekly so that is not the answer.

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A quiet room with leather recliner would be good enough for me. Of course, not that would have any chance in my non-new-techie company.

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ZenNUTS said:   A quiet room with leather recliner would be good enough for me. Of course, not that would have any chance in my non-new-techie company.
  Our leather sofa is uncomfortable. A recliner would be nice. I have seen our landlord put his filthy bare feet on our upholstered chairs and on our conference room table, etc. I wouldn't want him on the recliner unless there was a barrier between him and the furniture.

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Frick! After I have had a meeting on our office calendar for a month now, the Special Snowflake is taking off the morning of the meeting after another person signed up for the day off. I can't change the meeting which I'm leading anyway (video con with 7 other offices). SO lame. Most likely she hurt her back trying to help her "not all there" daughter move back in with the BF in another state after BF had agreed to move here. They each sound like losers and probably make a perfect couple. Daughter is the one with ESA (emotional support animal) because she claims she has a difficult time coping or whatever. And in Special Snowflake's infinite wisdom she drives 90 minutes each way to THE ONLY chiropractor who can help her. riiiiiiight, that really makes a lot of sense.

Honestly, these people would never survive if they had to work real jobs. I'm just sorry that my work responsibilities might get in the way of their personal lives.

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It's extremely bad from to send out business solicitation email from your gmail account AND request a read receipt. You are now added to McAfee spam database, you are welcome.

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Cleared driveway so I could come to work today.
Boss and two coworkers in team all called out and are working from home today due to yesterday's snow that ended around 3 PM
:-/

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I was issued a corporate credit card when I was hired at this job. It's the usual process of keeping receipts, producing a monthly expense report and submitting it for reconciliation to the Accounting Dept. I asked several times for a copy of the card statement or for access to it online so I could reconcile my expense report prior to sending it in and was denied. This week I was asked to provide manager approval for a job ad placement fee at an industry-specific website. The accounting person considered it to be a discretionary expense. I replied that it is a normal business expense. If these people have so much time to nitpick, maybe they need more work or responsibilities? If I wanted to steal from the company (we are employee-owned for goodness sakes!!!! Why would I steal from myself??) I would probably be more creative. The latest batch of people in the Accounting Dept seem to be all about CYA and not supporting our work, which IS the source of the company revenue. They should be doing all they can to help, not to hinder us.

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KayK said:   Cleared driveway so I could come to work today.
Boss and two coworkers in team all called out and are working from home today due to yesterday's snow that ended around 3 PM
:-/

Our office was closed Tuesday, I think that's only the second time in my years of working that's happened.  VPN was having issues at home, didn't get much done.

Parking lots were entirely clear yesterday after the storm.  Everyone in my group came in on time, except for the undercover agents.  They were up late waiting for some wack job to put out his trash so they could do their Wednesday 2 AM drive-by's.

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Hopefully in a few weeks will be starting a new job. Offer signed and sent back, just need to do paperwork, pee in a cup and set a start date.

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Here's a new hire tip: Make sure when you pee in the cup, the girl taking the cup from you doesn't let her hand linger on yours.

In all seriousness, congrats and good luck.

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scrouds said:   Hopefully in a few weeks will be starting a new job. Offer signed and sent back, just need to do paperwork, pee in a cup and set a start date.
  Best wishes!
At my former job we had to do a lab drug test that included hair sample, etc. At that time my hair was waist length and they cut it at my scalp from underneath in the back. Not a happy camper. This was after I had been working there for 3 years! Some of our staff had been working in the company for +15 years. It was ridiculous and perfectly in line with how that company worked (Schlumberger).

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I heard stories about Schlumberger. The things is, they craps they pull would never be legal under French law.

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ZenNUTS said:   I heard stories about Schlumberger. The things is, they craps they pull would never be legal under French law.
  We observed that the company attempted to cover their ass by dealing with the lower level of drilling/rig staff who could cause great damage to themselves, others and the environment if they effed up. They have to do drug testing, or used to when I was there. Our office was a consulting group composed of geologists and engineers. Not saying they were above substance abuse, but the nature of our work was vastly different than what employees do on an oil rig. I hated working for that company (they bought out the consulting group I was originally working for) and am exceedingly glad to be elsewhere. It was so oppressive and there was SO much BS to deal with every frickin' day.

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kirbydog said:   scrouds said:   Hopefully in a few weeks will be starting a new job. Offer signed and sent back, just need to do paperwork, pee in a cup and set a start date.
  Best wishes!
At my former job we had to do a lab drug test that included hair sample, etc. At that time my hair was waist length and they cut it at my scalp from underneath in the back. Not a happy camper. This was after I had been working there for 3 years! Some of our staff had been working in the company for +15 years. It was ridiculous and perfectly in line with how that company worked (Schlumberger).


Thanks at labcorp now. Hate them. 10 minutes after my appointment someone decided to look at the sign in sheet. At 15 over now, finally asked me why I'm herr Next time, I'll try a different location.

Almost went to the bathroom before coming here, thankfully caught myself.

Hair is not cool.

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scrouds said:   Hair is not cool.
  

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I work in local government. There are several "citizen watchdogs" that like to bother us with their hunches. After getting some records from a Freedom of Information Act (FOIA) request, one of them called in about a $150 expense on the books with a description of "Meet the Fonz." Without asking for clarification, he essentially said, "How dare you spend taxpayer dollars to go to some celebrity event?!?!?" Turns out that 10 special ed teachers ($15 per attendee) signed up for a talk being put on about dyslexia by Henry Winkler. Henry Winkler has dyslexia and has written 19 children's books with the main character based on him as a child. He regularly goes around doing these education conferences. Thanks for sending us on another wild goose chase Mr. Citizen Watchdog.

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meade18 said:   I work in local government. There are several "citizen watchdogs" that like to bother us with their hunches. After getting some records from a Freedom of Information Act (FOIA) request, one of them called in about a $150 expense on the books with a description of "Meet the Fonz." Without asking for clarification, he essentially said, "How dare you spend taxpayer dollars to go to some celebrity event?!?!?" Turns out that 10 special ed teachers ($15 per attendee) signed up for a talk being put on about dyslexia by Henry Winkler. Henry Winkler has dyslexia and has written 19 children's books with the main character based on him as a child. He regularly goes around doing these education conferences. Thanks for sending us on another wild goose chase Mr. Citizen Watchdog.
  How do you hide line items like, "Nubile Entrapment Pizza Girl --$500"?

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Do your local "volunteers" and Explorer Scouts pay for their own special secret extra-dark window tinting, or do you have to find creative ways to hide that in the budget?

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When you run your large organization's internal network on the 192.168 range, strange and bad things will happen when people connect from home. Don't do that.

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Last week I had to give an updater on a project that I am in charge of to a group of coworkers.
It's a big project with a six figure budget, it was to have a big impact on the company.
Reality is that it was cancelled last month, and the company owner does not want anyone to know for at least another month.

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You work for some kinda guy. Would be interesting to know how much cash he throws away In his personal life.

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People are complaining that our team meetings go too long and we laugh too much. Do we get our stuff done? We are one of the most visible departments in the company and we deliver. Seriously, leave us alone and let us laugh and get stuff done. 

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I got the official hand slap from Accounting that the $60 bar tab on a corporate credit card for a farewell event for a senior employee isn't something the company wants to have happen. buahahaha! They should be glad it was only $60 plus the $10 tip was paid in cash. tee hee.

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Very soon we might have three days teleworking instead of the current two

/fingers crossed.

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kirbydog said:   I got the official hand slap from Accounting that the $60 bar tab on a corporate credit card for a farewell event for a senior employee isn't something the company wants to have happen. buahahaha! They should be glad it was only $60 plus the $10 tip was paid in cash. tee hee.
That's a pretty light bar tab. I could drink $60 myself at a farewell party

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scrouds said:   
kirbydog said:   I got the official hand slap from Accounting that the $60 bar tab on a corporate credit card for a farewell event for a senior employee isn't something the company wants to have happen. buahahaha! They should be glad it was only $60 plus the $10 tip was paid in cash. tee hee.
That's a pretty light bar tab. I could drink $60 myself at a farewell party

  Yeah, that's what I wanted to say to the VP of Finance in response to her hand slap - we DESERVE this booze!
The bill could have been much higher but the bar selected doesn't serve food.

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I met a salesman once on a jetblue flight (or maybe it was AirTran, who knows at this point). I was running a day late, but in first class for my troubles. Flight attendant took our pre take off drink orders. The guy next to me ordered the macellan, and we talked about scotch for a little bit, me bing a complete neophyte.

Turned out he taught himself how to like scotch. Purely for business purposes to close deals with clients that would celebrate such with a fine scotch.

Nowadays, I enjoy fine bourbons and the occasional glass of scotch, but am resisting the urge to delve into the world of scotch, as it can be a very expensive venture.

Suffice to say, one person could hit that 60 mark and not even be drunk.

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The bar we were at has an extensive selection of whiskeys but a decent choice in tequila and mezcal as well. My fave sipping tequila is on par with scotch prices.

On Sundays they serve a meatshake: Organic tomato juice, secret seasonings and topped with steak, veggies, cheese and other goodies!

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As part of my job I read blogs and legal case decisions. Some articles and such I get from email lists while others I find via the Google. A former boss told me one time that I should read that stuff on my own time. Nope. I still read it. I just stopped sharing the information with her. She told me one time, "when you're on the internet I can't tell if you're working or goofing around." I told her that FWOT was a great resource and she never said anything else. But seriously, it's about 50/50 working/goofing around. And that's being generous because sometimes I'll goof around searching for cool work related stuff. Not because I don't have anything to work on but more like work avoidance. My google search history cracks me up sometimes.

Skipping 48 Messages...
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Our Special Snowflake's only daughter who can't take care of herself (she has an ESA, Emotional Support Animal, to help her among other things) just had a baby.6 weeks premature so he is in children's ICU for a few days. It's so sad.

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